Tone (shut your mouth when you’re talking to me)

A soft answer turneth away wrath: but grievous words stir up anger.
Proverbs 15:1 KJV

Watch just a few moments of almost any reality t.v. show and you’ll hear people so angry at someone else that they can’t even think straight.

I recall some comedian yelling at someone, mimicking those type of arguments saying, “You shut your mouth when you’re talking to me!”

Today’s proverb is really good advice.

A SOFT answer turns away wrath, but grievous words stir up anger. [Prov. 25:15.]
Proverbs 15:1 AMPC

A soft and gentle and thoughtful answer turns away wrath, But harsh and painful and careless words stir up anger.

A gentle response defuses anger, but a sharp tongue kindles a temper-fire.
Proverbs 15:1 MSG

Some people like to argue & debate. Personally I like to be slow to anger & difuse anger in my self, as well as try to de-exculate anger around me. It is a verbal judo of sorts.

God’s Word advises,

My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be

  • quick to listen,
  • slow to speak and
  • slow to become angry,

because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
James 1:19‭-‬20 NIV

It takes practice and I haven’t always done this, however, with each conflict that arises I try to pull away from what ever anger is brewing, stop & listen to what the other person is saying and slow down my response time.

Sometimes, in the heat of what we see as a challenge or battle, we may feel like we have to be quick to come back with…well, a ‘come back.’ God tells us the opposite. Many times God tells us to just react the opposite way that our human nature would normally reply, react or respond.

When we do that it may even shock us & those around us. It’s just not ‘normal’ and doesn’t give fuel to the fire of the continuous argument.

It never hurts to listen more & talk less. Some take that to the extreme too and give the silent treatment but giving a simple short answer or reply like, “O.k.”, lets the person know you’re not shutting them down or out and yet you are not giving them anything to throw back &, after they’ve blown off some steam, maybe you can both talk rationally & civil, rather than saying somethings you may not even really mean.

Don’t stir up anger, don’t let it brew, take it off the heat. Try giving soft answers that are warm and watch as a gentle answer turns away wrath.

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
Proverbs 15:1 NIV

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